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Thursday, September 10, 2020

This Is My Report Writing That Whaea Lana Has Been Helping Me With. Thank you whaea Lana for all of your help.

Here is my report that I have been working on recently, I really want to thank Whaea Lana for taking her time to teach us all about doing compound and complex any many more to come. Also, the thing that is really hard for me is that I get mucked up with the punctuation, and she has been helping us with changing our sentences and making them sound nice and so the reader can be interested in our writing. 

Name Fern, I'd like to see you asking your mum questions about why she opened this gym and maybe some stories of how it is addressing a need in our wonderful community. Opening of the Influence gym 

                         
                                                                      Introduction

 IN 2019 Rhonda Zielinski, who is a Kaikohe resident, opened up a women's only gym for all the women that need a workout without having all the boys around them yelling and all that. They could also have a quiet workout for as long as they want. also, women shy around men so they can work out in peace. 

                                                            Event 1 (when did it start?) 

 Rhonda Zielinski started it last year around June and July. It is really nice to have a women's only gym in kaikohe so that no men will interrupt their workout and so they can have a peaceful work out with no interruption, or so nobody can ruin what they are doing. Would you ever go to the Influence gym? 

                                                           Event 2: (where is it?) 

The Influence Gym, which is located right by the public toilet’s, and near the library. As u head down the road that goes to the little osca u will see the gym on the top of the florist it is a really good view when u go up there cause if you are there early in the morning before the sunrise then it will be the best view you have ever seen.  

                                                   Event 3: ( what is the reason for the opening?) 

Here is another reason. She opened the gym because Rhonda Zielinski lost her Job. For instance, she really needed another Job. So she made her own gym. Also, Rhonda Zielinski can have enough money to feed her kids, or pay the bills, so that Rhonda's Family won't be having to struggle with getting money for food or any other stuff they need for their family.


                                                                (conclusion) 

 So the reason why I chose this is because I wanted to talk about the influence gym so more people can join the influence crew and travel around the world doing marathons like the wall of china, Hawaii, New York City, and a lot more places and if u go You will have a really good time with them cause they always say. No troll left behind, and they will finish with even if they came last or any other place it won't matter what place you come. It's about working as a team and finishing together.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Fern, I know you are putting effort into your learning and want to congratulate you on your progress. This was so interesting to read. Well done on your changes to sentence beginnings and staying in third person.

    ReplyDelete
  2. thank you whaea lana for the feed back

    ReplyDelete